Have you ever stopped to consider where wedding traditions come from or better yet, how YOU feel about them? There are countless traditions from wedding veils to grooms’ cake and something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and depending on which ones you honor they can (in some cultures) make or break an entire marriage. Whether it’s having your ceremony in a church or the bride only wearing white, these traditions have become a staple of many wedding ceremonies and wedding budgets.
Not that I am against tradition, quite the opposite is true! My take on traditions comes down to a financial one. When you are stretching your dollars to make your day magical you need to consider the impact a tradition has on your budget. When you really think about the value or purpose; are you participating because you want to or because “they” say you have too? I think it’s about time we decide; should they stay, or should they go!
The Wedding Veil
In the past century, the veil has been used to signify a bride’s virtue and for many it has become a beautiful accessory completing a bride’s glamourous look. Although the exact origin of the veil tradition is unknown, research has uncovered the veil is rooted in pretty dark and dirty soil. In the tradition of arranged marriages; daughters who were used as a commodity in the union of families were often unseen by the groom before the wedding day. The veil was used to cover the bride’s face until after the ceremony was complete ensuring the groom wouldn’t back out of the deal!
Many historians agree that the veil first surfaced in ancient Roman wedding ceremonies as a way to protect the bride from evil spirits who were jealous of her happiness and were seeking to ruin the union. For centuries European women wore veils covering their hair for reasons like mourning and to signify “belonging” to a male.
The veil tradition has clearly evolved from it’s dark past and in some families has become a bridal heirloom. Unlike a passed down wedding dress, which would be nearly impossible, the veil has found a place in family traditions as an item that is shared among the women connecting them to their heritage. In this case, a veil worn by a mother is passed down to her daughters and from them to their daughters and so on. The veil remains unchanged and is an accessory exclusively for the daughters sharing the bloodline of the matriarch.
The Bouquet
As with every part of your wedding the decision is up to you! If you love how a veil looks and want a dramatic accessory for your day, absolutely go for it. If you want to embrace and honor the tradition of your family’s brides I say, go all in. For those of you that are considering purchasing a veil, you can expect the cost to start around $25 reaching upwards of $600. Maybe consider ditching the veil if you are giving up something that has greater meaning to you. Do you really need to ward off evil spirits or hide your beautiful face just in case the groom wants to change his mind?
Evil spirits were definitely “a thing” back in the day, bridal traditions are steeped in superstition. The origin of the bouquet is no exception and was another way to protect the bride from evil energies. Unlike today’s elaborate bouquets they used to be filled with bunches of garlic, herbs, and spices to ward off bad spirits. It was also believed the bouquet was a preventive tool to warding off the plague.
As with so many traditions that evolve over time, the bouquet has become a staple in nearly all weddings around the world. Brides typically select flowers based on their overall theme and color scheme or their personal favorites. The bridal bouquet is a perfect way to infuse your style into your wedding look. By honoring the idea of old (warding off evil spirits and energy) and the new (celebrating your personal style) you may create a remarkable piece for your day without breaking the bank. The bouquet can be as simple as a bunch of wild picked lavender or as elaborate as your imagination and wallet will take you.
Something Old, Something New, Something Blue, Something Borrowed
Something Old:
This to help tie the bride’s family, and “past” to her new future.
Something New:
Represents the brides upcoming life with her new husband.
Something Borrowed:
This should be from someone in a successful marriage to pass on good luck.
Something Blue:
Stands for faithfulness, loyalty and purity.
For some brides this can be a wonderful way to incorporate family heirlooms or gifts on your wedding day. For others, that may not have family heirlooms or deep-rooted relationships, this can be an unnecessarily stressful checklist. Finding items that check every box can add up and your guests will never notice the difference.
Before embracing a tradition, I propose you ask yourself:
- Will (a veil, bouquet, or something blue) enhance the celebration for you or your partner? If yes, then go for it and be sure you budget accordingly. If no, it’s time for the age-old tradition to GO.
- Will it your guest’s experience be better? If no, this is a strong reason for not using time or energy.
Join us for several tradition discussions and see which ones should stay and which ones should go!